Second Verse, Same as the First

It's back to the liquid diet again.  At least for an indeterminant "few days".  That's the plan.  At least the plan today.  <<insert expletive here>>

This morning I had an esophagogastroduodenoscopy.  I prefer to write that simply because I can't pronounce it, and frankly neither could the terrific nurse at the surgery center.  But to make the whole consent-signing moment kosher, apparently she had to at least go through the motions.  I offered her five bucks to say it a second time, to which she chuckled and reminded me that she was the one with the IV needles.  She also gave me the same look my wife often gives me, one that says I'm not as charming as I think I am.  So, we'll just call this morning's events an endoscopy, or EGD if you'd prefer. 

The procedure was easy and I don't think lasted ten minutes before they started rousing me.  My surgeon and I fully expected they'd discover some sort of esophageal stricture that they'd knock out with some dilation.  Instead, what they discovered was a more nebulous problem:  apparently bile from the small intestine is backing up through the stomach and up the esophagus, caused by the stomach not contracting as it should in digestion.  I left with a script for Reglan, which I am to take before each meal and before bedtime, supposedly will facilitate better digestion.  In addition to a digestive aid, Reglan is also a treatment for migraines; maybe I'm due for a double benefit.  I'll go back to the clinic in six weeks or so to reevaluate, and we'll regroup earlier if need be -- what the docs think today is truly a best guess at the moment.

All in all, I'd call the day frustrating:  frustrating that this isn't something that could have been solved while I was under anesthesia ... frustrating that we spent the better part of the afternoon back at the clinic to be only told nothing definitive by the surgeon ... frustrating that the wisest course is to go back onto liquids for several days before slowly reintroducing food once more.  The day wasn't a total loss, however, as Molly has the singularly unique ability to make even the crappiest of days a good time -- she has entertained me before by quite literally reading aloud from the phone book and she was a delightful companion today.  And, of course, I provided great fodder for her post-anesthesia with my walking and talking like a drunk.  She lets me get away with nothing.